Monday, October 11, 2004

Washington goes bats

Forget the debates. The real buzz around Washington these days is what to call the new baseball team.



As this year's return of Redskins coach Joe Gibbs demonstrates, nostalgia alone is no formula for sports success. But since Washington hasn't had a baseball team since I was in diapers, some optimism is forgivable.



Meanwhile, Mark Gauvreau Judge, grandson of Washington Senator Joe Judge, proposes how to improve the game itself: enlarge the field, bringing back "the game of stand-up doubles, triples and inside-the-park homers."



Without further ado, here are my - hopefully original - name proposals:



1. Flying creatures

Who says only Baltimore can be the Birds?



Bald Eagles

The national bird; some of them nest in the Washington area, including along the Potomac River near Great Falls.


Blue Herons

A majestic bird common to the region.


Bats

It's about time baseball had a team called the Bats, no? And what location is more appropriate?




2. Government creatures

Washington has had too many government-themed team names already: The Senators, the Nationals, the Capitals, the Diplomats, the Federals. Some have proposed the Presidents - boring!



Washington Insiders

Everyone wants to be one.


Washington Spooks

I could tell you why, but then I'd have to kill you.


Washington Buzz

What Washington's really about.


Washington Intrigue

Abstract nouns are in, they say.


Washington Subcommittees

Where the real power lies.




3. A capital city



Capital Crimes

Capital Offenses

Grim but accurate.


Capital Letters

They could play on Sesame Street.




4. The land of the free



The Freebasers

Overtones of baseball - and Marion Barry.


The Freeloaders

Speaks for itself.




4. Alliteration



Washington Wombats

Appropriately nonsensical.




Submit your own name suggestions to WTOP radio.

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